Archive for October, 2006

Zo mensen, lang niet meer in het nederlandse blog gepost.
Want de hele zooi is alleen in het engels gepost.
Ondertussen al bijna anderhalve maand niet gerookt,
maar nog steeds, vooral bij koud weer, krijg ik toch
verdomme zin in een sigaret. Maja… verder …
‘t gaat wel, kon beter, maar heb erger mee gemaakt.

Nu bezig met plannen verjaardagsfeest en zo voort.
Moet ook gebeuren. Maja …


well, about yesterday’s post. I don’ t want to worry anyone.
I am feeling fine now. But well … just … in the past days I
have more sad times then usual. But, well, no time to worry yet,



It was about one year ago, that I started to get depressed.
One year ago, when I started to feel lonely and sad.
But, back in that time, Demos, my student union, used
to be my feel-good-place. But now, I don’t give a shit
about Demos anymore. The atmosphere at Demos changed.
I don’t like it there anymore.

But, I am affraid, I am starting to have my sad moments again,
and stuff, I don’t want to go back there, but, I don’t know.
Yes, I do also have moments that I am happy and all, but still
these sad feelings seem to become more often :(
I don’t want this to happen, but I am affraid it is happening again :(

Just some random stuff this time.
First, I haven’t smoked for 1 month + 1 week now.

Love, peice and happyness have returned to BlaatSchaap.
To see Lars and Sara like that. Never seen them happier.

And also seeing Julia to have a new bf, Brian, even I have
never talked to him, but just from what I hear from Julia,
they are happy together too.

And also other people around me, oh well, I am happy
for them. To see they are happy, it makes me happy
too, but still, also, it makes me sad, being alone.
I don’t want to be alone anymore. I want somebody to love.

But I don’t see that happen soon, because I am so fucking shy.
I never could just, just say anything about my feelings when
talking to a girl, or something, w/e

Yes, that is silly me again, thanks for reading it anyways,

ZETA 1.21

And I still don’t have it.
Pre-odered it,
but mails from Magnussoft were marked as spam
by my spam filter, so, that is the first problem.
The seccond is all the stuff they need.
I need to send them my original ZETA 1.0
instllation cd, and the invoices.

Back in the yellowTab days, I ordered my cds
at Mensys. Never had problems, just logged in,
ordered my upgrade, payed, and got my cd
a few days later. I was in the computer, they
knew I bought a prevois version, and send me
the cd for the upgrade price.

But now I order the cd at Magnussoft, troubles.

I likes BeOS since I read the first review, and,
I think, yellowTab screwed it up, I hoped
magnussoft could make it better then yT did,
but seeing it to start like this, I am affraid not.



So, an update for now, quick one, I was about to go to sleep.
But there are still a few words I would like to post on this day.
See, today would have been the 9th months, if julia and I didn’t
break up the 1st of october. Since then, many things have
happened around BlaatSchaap, and also outside BlaatSchaap.
Not everything that happened is to be mentioned in public,

There were some bad days at BlaatSchaap, but peace and
happyness have returned to BlaatSchaap. And also love,
Sara and Lars now. Oh well… when I told Joyce, I knew
she wouldn’t beleive it, it was quitte funny on skype.
Anyways, much happyness to the new couple.

And an other couple I want to wish much happyness is
Julia and Brian. Maybe some of you may think it is weird
that i do so, but, even through I still love her, what I want
is her to be happy, and if that is without me, then that is fine.
Just be happy, that is all I ask them for.

love you all,
and till the next post :)

Ik zit weer eens te lezen. Veel te lang laten liggen dat boek.
Maar jah, nu weer eens een beetje tijd, dus boek erbij,
klassieke muziek aan, en lezen, lekker toch?

Ik zit dus de engelse versie van het eerste Harry Potter boek
te lezen. Lach me echt een deuk soms, echt, als je dat zo
leest, schiet ik soms echt in de lach.

So, I started reading some again, yeah, I know, I am
lazy when it is about reading, but well, I continued
reading the english version of the first Harry Potter
And I am doing this while listening to some Vivaldi.
Classical music is great while reading.

So, now I am free again, I am thinking about resuming
my old habit of shoutcasting every friday night.
So… every friday from 8 PM ( GMT+1 ) I will be
DJ-ing for you people.
When I am broadcasting, you can tune in at the site:

Have fun listening,

DeGekkeGek is back!!!!

Zo …. een week vrijheid. En nu ik weer vrij ben,
denk ik dat ik mijn oude gewoonte van vrijdagavond
shoutcasten weer ga hervatten.
Dus vrijdagavond vanaf 20 uur: Radio BlaatSchaap
Luister mee ;)