About trust, freedom and love…
what do those words mean to me?
What does it mean?
I have been writing about freedom a few times. And freedom is a concept that’s very important to me. Freedom of speech, Freedom of everything.
But, like I have tried to explain before, freedom doesn’t exist by itself. freedom is not universal. and you don’t just have freedom, but it is given to you by others.
Now, from my point of view, how should freedom and love relate? Especially the person I love should be free. I do not wish to restrict his freedom in any way. No promises, no obligations, nothing but freedom. This might sound scary, and that’s why trust is important.
I don’t want the person I love to stay in my life because I want him to. I don’t want him to stay because I need him. The only reason he should stay is because he wants to stay, because he needs me. It should all be, because he wants so. The ‘security’ of promises should be replaced by trust. That way, his presence in my life, him saying he loves me, gets true meaning. It gives love true meaning. He is free to disappear without a trace, but I trust him he will stay. Because he loves me like I love him. I have to trust that will never change.
But perhaps I am not going far enough yet. More freedom, because I trust him. I have asked a question before, in earlier posts in this blog, why is a person only supposed to love one person? I suggested it’s more of a cultural thing then anything else. Therefore, I say I should give him the freedom to ‘see other people’. He can love someone else too. I trust him. I trust I won’t lose him if he does. Well, under the condition the other person shares this vision of course. The worst thing that could happen is being forced to choose between two people you love(*). I don’t want to put the person I love in that position, therefore he should be free.
Perhaps, an interesting side-effect might be, what if… the person I love and me both develop feelings for the same person?
(*) I have been in such a position. This was in a time I didn’t have this view yet. I developed feelings for two people… and feeling like I had to choose was tearing me apart. I wanted them both. Therefore I say, it is possible to have strong feelings for two people at the same time. So that’s why I am mentioning this.
Love… giving everything you have and expecting nothing in return.